Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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