i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
