So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
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