How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
