office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
where are you?
Hypothermia
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize