Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
He felt like a one man threesome
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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