All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
