My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
