i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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