Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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