just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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