my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
