i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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