I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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