No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize