what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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