But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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