That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
