Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
