Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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