Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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