My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
