But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
