Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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