Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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