Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Quick, to the slutcave!
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
