I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
