He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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