I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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