Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
