I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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