I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
