Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
