Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
