i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
