For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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