I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
