please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
