i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
