My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
So I just went to clothing optional bar
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
