Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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