Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
