dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
