There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
