i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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