My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
