Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
3 2 1 whiskey
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
