i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
