At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Randomize
