Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
