i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
